Should you be glad when they go?

Today is my little girl's first morning at playgroup. She is two. She is absolutely and definitely the last child to be produced by this worn out old body. She is a happy, confident, chatty sociable little girl and I have no doubt that she will love it. As she was only two in December, I am not in a rush, so she is just going to go for one morning a week for the time being. Three hours. That's not too long is it? It has provoked some interesting comments however. When I was talking about it last week, one of the other mum's at school said; "Oh, I bet you'll be in tears, when you have to leave her behind. Your baby." Another said: "No, one morning a week isn't enough, you should put her in for a few mornings, have a bit of a break!"

This did get me thinking about how I actually did feel about my 'baby', starting playgroup for the first time. Which side of the fence was I on: the glad to get rid of her, or the oh my god, she's not going, she's staying with me side?

In reality, I am somewhere in the middle. This new step is an important part of A's development. She is strong willed and confident and having three older brothers, she has already learnt that she needs to be louder, stroppier and pushier in order to get her own way in a house full of children. I don't feel guilty. Why should I? Yes, I realise that she doesn't have to go to nursery until she's three or at all really, but it will do her good. It will give her the chance to meet new people, have friends, interact with different adults and do things that she would not necessarily get the chance to do if she was stuck at home with me.

I get emotional about things ending rather than beginning. With three older ones, I have already had my fair share of finishing: playgroup, first school, middle school. Now that does bring out the tears. It marks the end of an era, it means that they are moving on to the next stage, growing up.

So I'm not going to feel guilty about not getting emotional this morning. A small selfish part of me will enjoy having a couple of hours to myself as it's not something I have very often, and then I will go and pick A up, she will have had a fantastic time and all will be well in the world.

Off she goes with her trusty Minnie Mouse bag!