What's sex then, mummy?

I'm sure that this question is up there with one of the more interesting moments of parenting.  My eight year old dropped it into the conversation  on Friday night as I was driving him to his swimming lesson.  I totally wasn't expecting it and I nearly crashed the car.

He was chatting about a friend in his class and how he likes two girls and then he kept making up silly  songs about it and then he asked me what rhymed with sex. 

OK, I was quite surprised by that and said that maybe he should choose a more appropriate word.  Fatal.  "What is sex then, mummy?"

I told him that he was a bit young really to be having this conversation but that just made him even more curious.  He was looking at me intently.  So I asked him where he had got the word from.  School.  Damn, that didn't help or stop him looking at  me, waiting expectantly. 

OK, try and turn it back on him. "What do you think it means, then?"  I asked.  Yes I know, really rubbish.  His response?  "I think it when a boy and a girl kiss each other, no snog each other all day and all night."

I wasn't expecting that.  So I asked him:"What's the difference between snogging and kissing then?" 
"Oh mummy, you know.  Kissing is kissing and snogging is a bit longer and dribblier!"

Not a bad observation really for someone so young.  I took a deep breath and told him that he was a bit young for me to explain sex to him but that it was what mummy's and daddy's did to make babies.

He went quiet for a couple of minutes and I started to worry, thinking that maybe I shouldn't have said that.  "So mummy, that means that you and daddy have had sex twice then while I've been asleep!"  He chirped with a big grin on his face. 

I didn't reply although I was thinking to myself that he probably wasn't that far from the truth!  Did I handle the question well?  I'm not really sure.  I am quite open with my children as I feel that if you talk about things and explain things to children, you don't create tabooed subjects or confusion.  I appreciate that there are certain things that might not be appropriate for younger ears and minds, but children seem to know so much more at an early age these days.

I was thinking about what I had told my oldest son who is now sixteen and probably knows more than me on the subject.  He loved the television program 'Friends' and started watching it when he was about eight.  I never had a problem with him watching it, but it did throw up some unusual questions along the way.  I ended up explaining some things to him that he was maybe a bit too young to understand, but the open discussions that we had didn't do him any harm.

Understanding is the key in this situation I think.  You have to judge the answers to these 'delicate' questions on the age, maturity and understanding of each individual child.  R is mature and seemed quite happy with the answer I gave him.  I didn't feel the need to draw him a diagram and going into too much detail isn't appropriate at his age.  In just over two years, when he goes to middle school, he will start learning about sex and reproduction at school and I have no doubt that the conversation will come up again in the meantime.  I'll go and sharpen my pencil...